Somehow I have every January a post, explaining that I am back, that everything was so hectic and that I hope the next year will be better for me or my writing. Well, I can’t disappoint the few true souls that stick with me 🙂 So here it goes:
2014 really was a roller-coaster: amazing, intimidating, scary, joyful, sad, transformational, disillusioned, inspiring and so much more. At least this year I entered some posts to the travel blog “Keep it weird“. I originally created it for a 3 month trip last summer, which I have spent with my friend and now partner Hass in America. But I decided to keep the blog alive, to split my bi- or tri-monthly ramblings from my travel experiences. Probably I will post the same article on both blogs though.
Within one year I gained experiences some people don’t gather in a life time.
I loved, and lost and hated and wondered and been in awe and in depressions and got shot down and picked up. I fought for and lost my relationship of 13 years – and if I am honest to myself already in the beginning of the last year.
I went on a dream trip with a dear friend that first had been my companion and now turned out to be so much more. There where tough decisions waiting for me around every corner of 2014 and the toughest, when I would come back from the USA road trip. I still hoped then and had the hope slowly crumble with every extra mile on the road and I hated to admit defeat as I had to leave my house, dreams, surrogate family, love and cat behind.
However, don’t dread. I love stories with a happy ending, so this post will have one too, because I honestly can say, even if I am still struggling at times with my emotions and the situation, I enjoy the door that opened as the one in Beverwijk slammed shut.
I loved living at the beach, but I never really enjoyed the Netherlands. For now I moved to London and I am intending to move every 2-4 years until I find a place that feels like home, not only because of the people I am with, but because of the land, culture and weather. London won’t be it, I can tell already, but I am happy that I am doing this experiment. London as city is beautiful, even in winter. And call me crazy, but I have the feeling it rains way less there than it did in Beverwijk.
The art, culture, beauty of architecture and diversity in food, people and opportunities are calling me like a siren into the city center. The bureaucracy, catch 22 over and over, stubbornness and unfriendliness… maybe not unfriendliness but a sort of being entirely self involved in general and especially on the streets … feeds my wish to just let it be and move on right here and now.
I will not of course. The siren is louder and I intend to do at least the most basic tourist stuff as long as I can. Things seem to change so fast and if my life so far has taught me anything: you have to take every chance, which crosses your path and of course you have to teach yourself to be open minded and recognize them. Life has a way to lead you to the good stuff, if you just listen and follow. Not that I pay too much attention to that sort of teachings, but this attitude is confirmed in hundreds of anti-depression and ‘i lost my way’ blogs out there.
Though we are officially living here in London now since end of November, I haven’t been often to town. Going on your own exploring seems to be a skill, which needs to be acquired as well. But I am doing OK as soon as I am out and about. Until now I always combined it with things I had to do. Bank appointments, writing myself in etc .. next step is to just go for the heck of it. I am confident that I will make progress very soon.
I also picked up my passion for photography. We got ourselves a DSLR and I have in a few days a one day course to get acquainted with aperture, ISO & shutter speed, white balance and whatnot. I can’t wait to take my love to the next level. I also asked around in the Facebook page for our building complex and found myself a willing soul to help me out once in a while.
Here already some shots I took around town: